As my faithful followers will notice, I changed the title of my blog...it was inspired by my good friends Karen and Monty, and, I think, it captures more of the essence of me.
I haven't been writing lately, because I simply haven't had time, and I haven't felt inspired. I don't feel particularly inspired today either, except that I noticed I've been a slacker, and I should probably write something. So, I'm going to write about...MYSELF.
It's a bit of a selfish topic, but it's what I've been learning the most about lately. I have had an amazing summer, filled with reunions, laughs, epic failures, many many "Meryl Moments", and just a few frustrations. I've done everything from sitting on my bed doing absolutely nothing, going to weddings, shooting NERF guns in downtown San Francisco, laughing until it hurts, drinking to the point of hilarity, to finally sitting here writing the most boring blog ever known to man.
I've learned to appreciate friendships, parents, my faith, and surprisingly, my job. But most of all....I have learned to appreciate good music. I'm actually going through a huge classical phase at the moment. All of this sounds good, right? Right. Except I am missing one very important thing...a husband...someone to grow old with, raise children with, and....::heavy sigh::. Which is why I have decided to make a list of the top ten requirements for my ideal husband....let me know if you're interested.
1. You must sleep in every day, and never get a job.
2. You must have at least ten tattoos, and five body piercings...otherwise, my Dad WILL NOT approve.
3. You must enjoy heavy metal music and blast it at odd hours of the night, so that the neighbors have to call the cops....we have to keep our life exciting you know?
4. You must scream at our 2.5 children every day so that they learn to hate us, because duh....they just wouldn't grow up to be normal, if we were nice to them.
5. You must NEVER shower...mmmmm...I just love that cornchip smell.
6. Oh yes, religion, Athiest is preferable, but Agnostic will suffice. We need opposite opinions in our household to keep everything PC for our kids.
7. You must treat my like dung on the heel of your shoe, because I just DON'T want to get jealous and clingy. Treating me like crap will help me keep my distance.
8. You must have SUPER annoying parents that make me want to kill myself...it just wouldn't be right if I liked them.
9. Go out and get drunk with your old garage band buddies every night. This is just so I KNOW that you've been out getting drunk, and I don't have to ask. It will save a lot of time and frustration.
10. If you MUST show me affection, do it in the most embarrassing way possible...like calling me a really disgusting name like "my gooey googley honey muffin cake" and then flatulate really loudly. This will make me extremely happy and keep our marriage in tip top shape.
***Bonus (not required, but it will give you extra brownie points) if you have a super awesome name like Billy-Joe Bob, or Pookey, or Hal, or Butch....and even more brownie points if you have a beer belly!
These are just some of the requirements for a young Catholic girl's future husband, but they ARE the most important. I honestly just can't think of anyone dreamier than that person I've just described.
I've included a picture, just as an example:
